I’m a little high on cold medicine and these thoughts popped up in my head, so I decided to share them. My mind is having an active day, probably due to lack of sleep. This helped silence it.
If overthinking was a job then I would be CEO of it. While it’s important to self reflect on why we do things, sometimes we just do shit without thinking. Reconsidering my inner voice of an authoritarian parent to a loving partner. My mind is calm some days and other times it races and I can’t complete one thought. I think too deeply about life and it’s purpose. I admire those who just do and don’t think about it. Then I see the downfall of the absence of self-reflection. There is no forward movement in their lives. They bide their time by the rules of societies assembly line. The hardest thing to do is find balance. I think a lot of life is about obsession and regression. Then we progress and strengthen through our mistakes. But, what happens when we don’t? That’s when the overthinking kicks in.
“What’s wrong with me? I keep doing this shit.”
Well, I don’t know what’s wrong with us. Maybe some hate routine and crave chaos. We like doing it. What If we just let ourselves move through it and see what happens? I don’t know about you, but I judge myself so harshly when I mess up. I have a lot of different friends and as I get to know them I realize that their lives are not all together. Is it ever really? Or do we just learn to laugh and love ourselves more? What is normal really? Depending on where you live you will get different answers. I guess it boils down to our own truth. Without fear of rejection from others, what do we want? People are flighty and selfish. They have their own hidden motivations. Our normal is more important than their acceptance.
I wrote this as a reminder to myself. To walk the path and not judge myself each time I trip. I will not stand there and beat myself up about the obstacle but step over it and keep walking. I will look around and invite people along my path and let them go if they want to leave when the road splits.